Why self care is so g@# da&* important

Thursday, April 19, 2018
So we're moms and we never sit down.  We are up the moment we hear feet shuffling, or before if you're me and desperately need those moments before everyone is awake to yourself on those mornings you can actually drag yourself out of bed to get them.  You make breakfast. You race them to school drop off.  You race yourself to pilates/soul cycle/the TRX class that you love that starts at 9 and you can barely get the last few square inches left in the class or any equipment because you've barely made it there. You race to shower, race to get dressed and try to look kind of stylish given major time constraints and no brain cells to put together an outfit.  You race to volunteer at Science lab even though you have a laundry list of things to do outside and inside the home but your son is going to be fuming at you if you blow it off AGAIN this month. You get recruited while your racing out of the school to volunteer at 6 other fundraisers. You race to fit your one errand in before racing back to pick up your son at preschool who is crying because he didn't think you were ever coming back.  You race home to get him a snack. You race through a quick play time with him because its time to pick up your other son. You race him home saying no we can't go to the science lab to hold the gekko because you're going to be late for your motor skills class across town. You race more snacks into him so he doesn't get low blood sugar and act out in the car ride to and from.  You race home and wonder how anyone can remember or think about whats for dinner or how to get dinner started at 4:45 when you haven't even thought about it and now the kids are beating each other up, looking for personal attention and releasing from the day.  You race to get dinner on the table and clean it up before bedtime if you're lucky because its the last thing you want to think about when the kids are in bed. You try to convince your husband to give them a bath because you totally flaked on it last night and their fingernails are dirty and their feet are black. Race to get them in to bed on time so you have YOUR time, race to get them their last sips of water so they don't get out of bed again, race to try to get at least one thing taken care of before the next day so you're not racing all over again.  When you finally sit down, you melt your brain to Real Housewives or the Bachelor or some other show where people get drunk and fight. 


Why are we so tired and burnt out and stressed and resentful all the time?  We don't spend any time going within, and checking in with ourselves and taking a moment to ask what's coming up and making our teeth clentch.  We need to take more deep breaths before stressful times of day (like jetting out to fetch our children). We need to journal and let our thoughts out and vent to a friend or a professional or some solid form of positive support.  We need to listen less to time suckers and complainers who drain us and don't fill us up.  We need to sit and think and be at peace with our minds and BREATH.  If we don't, this cycle continues.  I am very guilty of it, and I find the more I let my time get dominated by trips to the dry cleaner/target/UPS, the more stress and anger shows up for me and then...I get sick.  Why? It is the only way for the universe and your body to say "SIT THE FUCK DOWN". Its sad but I always see the pattern.  I'll be going along, ignoring me, putting all my efforts into everyone else, and all of a sudden I wake up with a sore throat or a new cold.  Then I know its time to chill.  Why does it take this to force ourselves to take a break? 

I'm giving you this advice just as much as I'm giving it to myself. Log on to Headspace.  Buy a really pretty journal.  Walk your dog and listen to inspiring Ted Talks.  Spend an hour looking through Pinterest design ideas and creating your own boards with your dream house.  Do what you love and what lights you up, and I feel like the race will be over.  Or at least feel better.  I want to feel successful in ALL aspects of my life, not just the surviving-not-thriving momhood responsibilities. I know this sounded like a negative rant but I feel better now, saying it.  Thanks for listening. Now go plan an adult playdate.

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